Ford Puma

Why I’ve ruined 2019’s most exciting new car

IT’S A SLIGHTLY strange child who gives the Ford Puma pride of place on their bedroom wall, beside the Ferrari F355, Lamborghini Diablo and TVR Cerbera.But this isn’t just any old bedroom wall – it’s mine, circa 1996. I mention this curious gallery of petrolhead goodness, where even a Wannabe-era Geri Haliwell didn’t make an appearance because there were so many cars to peruse, since price, fuel economy, MPG and insurance groups didn’t matter one jot. A car just had to look great and have a certain panache about it, so a tiny Fiesta-based coupe which later developed a horrendous reputation for wheelarch rot made it up there.

But were I to have a pint-sized Simister nurturing a passion for cars I’m not sure any of today’s more affordable offerings would qualify for a few inches of bedroom wall real estate. I had a look through some of the new cars due to hit the showrooms later in 2019 and once you dip into the real world realms of cars that aren’t an Aston Martin Valkyrie or Aventador SVJ there’s an endless succession of anonymous crossovers. Even the Polestar 1 – which looks like a posh Volvo, because essentially it is one – is expected to cost upwards of £100,000

But there is one that I’m really, really looking forward to. The Honda Urban EV has a delightfully Ronseal name – it’s an electric city car made by the chaps who brought you the Jazz – but it’s so much more than that. When it struck a pose at the world’s motor shows about 18 months ago it made so many jaws drop that it was promptly named as 2018’s World Concept Car of the Year, and since then Honda has said that it’ll appear, virtually unchanged, in showrooms here as a fully-fledged production model.

Good. There are plenty of electric cars out there that’ll do everything you ask of them (which is why UK sales were up 69 per cent in 2018), but only the endearingly bonkers but utterly impractical Renault Twizy and the lovely-but-pricey Jaguar I-Pace have even registered on the Simister want-one radar. With the Urban EV there might be a third, because it looks like it’s escaped from the set of Ready Player One.

It has that reimagined Eighties look that’s so in vogue at the minute completely nailed; take the ‘H’ badge off it and I’d swear the chunky, bluff-fronted grille, round headlights, skinny window pillars and tight proportions screamed MkI Golf. In fact, I can just imagine the Urban EV with a red stripe around the edges of the grille and a GTI badge on the back! Inside it’s brave too – two benches instead of individual seats, and a huge, touch screen slab rather than a dashboard.

In fact, there’s only one problem – the Renault Wind, Toyota IQ and Nissan Cube were also uncompromisingly brave small cars that won me over, and none of them were exactly sales hits here. So I’ve essentially, if precedent for praising small cars in these pages is anything to go by, just given the Urban EV the kiss of death.

Sorry about that, Honda. I really hope I’m wrong this time!

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Lupo GTI a classic? You bet

Long before the Up, VW nailed the small hot hatch with the Lupo GTI.jpg

IF YOU want to know who the gatekeepers are when it comes to what is – and what isn’t – a classic car you have to think literally. Often, it’s the people in hi-vis jackets manning the entrances at your nearest car show.

Normally if I’m approaching in my MGB, I could put my house on being waved through with a warm smile (unless it’s a show catering solely for hotted-up Subarus, of course), but I’ve approached in many a car where it could go either way. At one show I was given an appreciative nod because I’d shown up in an MG ZR, which for all its rock-hard suspension and mesh grille is basically your mum’s Rover 25 with a snazzier badge. Yet barely a week later a Ford Puma, a swoopy coupe that did wonders for Ford’s image when it was new, met with a solemn expression and an outstretched arm pointing me in the direction of the public car park, alongside all the Vauxhall Insignias and Kia Cee’ds.

So what advice could I give the chap who emailed from Crosby the other day, pondering whether his beloved Volkswagen Lupo GTI has made it to classic car-dom? This petite hot hatch is essentially the early Noughties predecessor to today’s Up GTI, and shares its no-frills, lightness-added sense of fun. A lot of what made the original Golf so much fun lives on in both.

It has an awful lot going for it, but because it’s the equivalent of an 18-year-old queuing up for a nightclub with a freshly-shaven face, wearing trainers – I wouldn’t be surprised to see it being turned away at the door. The Lupo GTI has a few years yet before it’ll be accepted just about everywhere – turn up at Goodwood or Brooklands in one, for instance, and the gatekeepers will probably laugh – but show up to one of the many Veedub-specific shows across the country this summer and it’ll be met with appreciative nods and quiet mutterings of what a corking – and rare – car it is.

Despite the Government’s best efforts there is no hard and fast rule as to what constitutes a classic car, and I’m glad that there isn’t. One of the questions my Lupo-owning friend pondered was whether cars made between 2000 and 2010 now count as classics, but it’d be too simplistic to argue that a mid-spec Toyota Auris, for instance, is one simply because it was made in the same era as the little GTI. The Teletubbies got to number one barely a few weeks after The Verve’s Bitter Sweet Symphony didn’t – but does that mean it’s stood the test of time?

Some things become classics overnight, and for some it’s a slow-burning process that takes decades. I’ve always reckoned the most important thing is how much time and love people put into them – and it’s the same for VW Lupos, Morris Minors, Triumph motorcycles, steam locomotives, and copies of Bitter Sweet Symphony.

Just be prepared for a man in a hi-vis jacket to disagree with you.